


Those Were the Days

by syntheticvision



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Breeding Kink, Dark Steve Rogers, F/M, Gender Roles, Heavy Angst, Marital angst, Marriage, Miscommunication, Smut, twisted ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:40:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28187820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syntheticvision/pseuds/syntheticvision
Summary: Landing another promotion at work should be a cause for celebration. Married to Captain America himself, you’ve found building your own legacy takes a lot of work and sacrifices.As plans for the future go by the wayside due to your busy schedule, Steve begins to apply pressure for you to have a family and to slow down - once and for all.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Reader, past Steve Rogers/Peggy Carter
Comments: 63
Kudos: 139





	1. Chapter 1

Flutes of champagne were held up in the air as you made your way toward the table of your colleagues, applause drawing attention from the other patrons that looked on with interest as you placed yourself into a chair. The heat rose in your cheeks as embarrassment took hold at the public display of your latest accomplishment. A promotion that netted a brand new office overlooking the city, more responsibilities, and a work schedule that would be even more demanding than the job you were leaving behind. This is what you had worked for, the long days that meddled into nights, the countless hours of schmoozing clients, and jetlag to get to this point in your career. You were proud of what you accomplished. The ones in your circle, the mentors and mentees that were around this table, they were proud of you, too.

As the call for a speech began to gain traction, you lifted your glass with a small shake of your head before the call was cut short by your husband, whose presence changed the intensity of the table as you stood to greet him, his arm sliding against the small of your back as he pulled you toward him. Appreciative glances and small waves with hellos met him while you allowed him to lift you up slowly, the tip of your toes barely touching the floor.

“Sorry I’m late,” he whispered against your ear, kissing your cheek softly before he helped you with your chair.

Steve Rogers, always the gentleman, let you have your moment as he hung back behind your seat, declining a flute of champagne that was offered to him. You’d noticed there wasn’t a place for him at the table and you looked back at him with an apologetic smile before he motioned for you to enjoy yourself with that half-grin that you loved so much. You could tell by his button-down shirt and jeans that he’d changed quickly, no doubt fresh off a mission. Your eyes went to his hands and then to his face, looking for any sign of bruises like you always did. Finding none, your attention went back to the table.

“No speech,” you conceded with a small laugh. “Just a humble thank you for always being uplifting, holding me accountable, and making sure we took the time to be more than co-workers. We went through hell at times with deadlines, schedules, and having a work-life balance. I know I’m guilty of that. But we always pulled through.”

You looked back at Steve, who merely raised an eyebrow before he gave a slow nod. If you didn’t know any better, he seemed uncomfortable at your mention of a work-life balance. It was a sore subject between you both, something that you’d tried to work on in the past.

“To the greatest team I’ve ever had the pleasure of working for,” you praised.

As the glasses clinked together, you finished your champagne in one sitting.

It was time to celebrate.

⏳

“Did you have a good time tonight?” Steve asked behind you as you slipped off your heels and placed them back onto the rack. It felt good to be home, back in the comfort of your own shared space.

“I did. I’m going to miss them. It’s not going to be the same, you know?” You were tired, the warmth of the alcohol still in your system as you pulled a hanger off the rack, shrugging off your blazer. “I was really lucky to have them.”

“They were lucky to have you,” Steve corrected, strong arms pulling you toward his broad chest. He kissed the top of your shoulder, still holding you close. “ _I’m_ lucky to have you. I don’t suppose they’ll let you have a week off before you start, will they?”

You had to lean forward to reach over to place the blazer on the rack, Steve not letting you go as you laughed at your awkward position. It had been a difficult two weeks. Both of your schedules were packed, crawling into bed to savor what little hours of sleep you could. On the days that Steve was home, you’d tried to leave the office early, only to be pulled back in by replying to emails or dealing with a crisis. You understood the hesitation, the reason he was holding onto you a little longer than he would before. Your time together would be cut even shorter with this new job.

“I wish, honey. I’m flying out to Seattle next week for a few days.” You all but mumbled the words, feeling his arms go slack around you.

“Next week? They didn’t waste any time, did they? What’s a few days? Two or three?”

You scrunched up your nose as you answered. “More like four or five.”

“Sounds like you’ll be traveling almost double with this promotion. You sure you’re up for that?”

You started unbuttoning your blouse, watching him lean against the doorway as his hands jammed into his pockets. There was no mistaking his silence. The somberness in the air was palatable.

“I already said yes so… yes? It’s part of the gig. We talked about it, remember? A few extra days here and there,” you reminded him as you tossed your shirt into the dry cleaning bag.

“A few extra days isn’t a week, sweetheart. Forgive me if I’m jumping the gun here but we started talking about taking some more time off before you took the position.”

“And we will,” you promised, guilt trickling into your body at his disappointed expression. “Give me a month or two to settle in and get my bearings and we’ll go somewhere nice. That means you have to actually give up going on a mission or two as well, you know.”

“No complaints from me.”

As you pulled on an oversized t-shirt, you shimmied out of your skirt, tossing it into the laundry basket as you reached for a pair of shorts.

“You say that now until Sam gets his way,” you teased, his smile fading.

“You think I’m kidding? I told you I’ve wanted to spend more time with you. You don’t even need this job. I could take care of both of us.”

It wasn’t time to argue. Not with the nice send off your team had given you. Just once you wanted to have a nice night, without feeling any guilt or remorse.

“Steve,” you warned, pulling the drawstring on your shorts taut. “Can we please not talk about this tonight? It was a nice dinner and we haven’t had a night to ourselves in forever.”

“Fine. I’m sure you’ll pencil me in sometime in a month to discuss this. Maybe over FaceTime or Zoom? Or you’ll leave me a voicemail to apologize. I’m a big fan of those.”

Before you had a chance to answer, he turned his back on you, lifting his hands up in the air before he disappeared out of the room.

Bing Crosby filtered in the air as you reached the bottom of the stairs, where Steve laid out on the sofa in the dark, the glint of his wedding ring catching your eye.

“Ken Darby Singers, right?” you guessed, trying to gauge his mood.

The last thing you wanted to do was go to bed with him upset. With his missions, there was a small part of you that was always a little afraid of something going wrong. There would be time for a vacation. You would make sure of it. You’d make it up to him and try to surprise him.

“Yup,” he answered you, blinking at the ceiling. “Did you look it up or something?”

“I do know my music, you know. Bing is a classic.” You approached the couch as he sighed, opening his arms as you while you climbed on top of him gently, your head resting on his chest as you heard his heartbeat. He was warm, your eyes closing

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, his arms wrapping around you once more. “I love you, Steve. I don’t want us to fight. I’ll ask for some time off and we can just disappear somewhere. Just you and me.”

It was quiet for a moment as his fingers skimmed up and down your spine. This is where you belonged, right here in this moment, where everything seemed right.

“I love you too,” came his reply, his voice much brighter than before. “Maybe we can actually work on our plan to have a baby.”

You nodded slowly, keeping silent as you tried to factor in a baby with your new job. It would be a while before you could fully commit to having that conversation but for now, you could placate him with an agreement.

“Sure,” you answered, feeling his arms hold you tighter while you heard his sigh of contentment.

“Good.”


	2. Chapter 2

Steve downed the contents of his water bottle in one sitting, glancing at Bucky who looked at his watch as he timed the results. Both of them half out of breath, twenty miles completed before the sunrise. Steve’s mind wandered to where you were now, which state you’d crossed, and if you were awake at this hour.

“You barely beat me this time, old man,” Bucky goaded with a laugh. “You’re getting slow in your old age.”

Steve hung his head with a dramatic sigh before he let out a low laugh, wiping his brow with a towel that he had slung over his shoulder. Their usual runs were quicker than this, Steve almost always pulling ahead with Bucky not too far behind. The metal arm gave some resistance but he could still keep up. Sam stopped trying to compete with them years ago.

“Got a lot on my mind these days, I guess,” Steve admitted.

“How’s the wife? I haven’t seen her around lately.”

“That makes two of us. She was in Chicago last week and now she’s in LA. A few more days and she’ll be back home and then I think after that, she’s going to Seattle.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow at the schedule, giving a nod while Steve shook his head. Bucky knew that silence from his best friend; the struggle of wanting to say everything and nothing at all. Steve had been pushing himself more than usual. More missions conducted, detailed debriefs – all things that kept him busy so he didn’t have to go home to an empty house.

“Things sure have changed. It’s taboo to say now but sometimes? It was nice when women didn’t have to work. Sounds crazy to say now, looking at the world we live in. Nat would probably strangle me with her bare hands if she heard that. But you remember it too. You could spend quality time with your wife, no business trips. Things were simpler back then.” Bucky scoffed at his words, almost spoken in a whisper so that no one else could hear, even though it was just the two of them.

Bucky contemplated for a moment, a grin appearing. “There’s some good in the now. Beer is better. Sex is too.”

“You could say that again,” Steve agreed, the tension inside him fading. “I didn’t mind it at first. You know seeing her happy makes me happy. But sometimes, I just… I want my wife back. When she was still eager to see me and didn’t worry about her career. We’ve been putting off talking about a family for a while. That job is her priority, no matter how much we argue about it.”

“You think? Even more so than you?”

Steve’s jaw clenched at the question. “Sometimes? Yeah, even more than me.”

“Makes you miss the old days, doesn’t it?”

Steve thought about it for a moment.

“Yeah,” he decided. “It does.”

⏳

The rain pattered down on the window, the lights outside blurry while you paced back and forth, cell phone in hand in case it rang. It was late, even by your standards, but you couldn’t sleep. Steve had been right after all, missing your scheduled FaceTime call after a meeting ran long. Remorse pooled in your stomach while you left a voicemail, apologizing at least four times and hoping he would answer.

You’d signed off of the voicemail with the usual ‘I love you’ that had seemed a little more somber than usual and hoped that he would return your call. It was odd that he hadn’t called you back. He was usually quick to see the missed call and return it, almost as soon as you would hang up. You’d glanced down at the phone at least four more times until the screen blacked out due to inactivity, your finger tapping the screen to make it come alive in case he texted.

When there was nothing, your mind began to wonder if he was out with Bucky or Sam. Maybe a little time with friends would help him and you hoped that was the case. If he was on a mission, you hoped he was safe, like you always did. You resisted the urge to call him again, unsure if you would be interrupting anything.

The text that came through, nearly making you drop your phone was not from him but from one of your new colleagues, asking if you wanted to accompany her to a bar a few blocks away. Driving in the cold and rainy weather didn’t seem appealing but as you looked through the window, the rain appeared to slow down.

You didn’t want to pass up an opportunity to get to know her, perhaps even network, depending on who else was coming. There was still no answer from Steve and you didn’t want to mope in your dark hotel room.

Flicking on the light in the closet, you pulled out your suitcase, opening it up to find something suitable to wear.

Once you pulled on a sweater and shrugged into your jacket, you checked your phone once before you left, only to be greeted by your lock screen. Though the guilt surrounded you, you promised yourself that you would not miss the good morning phone call for the next day. You’d cleared the first hour of your day to dedicate it to him. Hopefully, he could come to understand that you could balance both your career and your personal life.

While the rain seemed to cease as you grabbed the keys for your rental car, you hesitated once more, sending him a text that simply let him know that you were thinking about him before you closed the door behind you.

⏳

“Miss? Miss, can you hear me?”

The voice floated through your head, your eyes fluttering open at the sound while a bright light shone into your pupils. Pain registered through your body, the man in front of you coming into focus. Broken glass was sprinkled onto your arms, your pants ripped at the knee while the sound of a door opening seeped into your ears. Trying to move your head was a chore, your screech of agony sounding like a wounded animal.

“Breathe, okay? We have to get you out of here.”

Shades of red and white flickered above you as you blinked slowly. It felt like you were underwater, your body being pulled from the twisted metal. It was bad, whatever they were pulling you from. The smell of gasoline and burnt leather hung in your nose.

“Steve?” you asked the strangers, their eyes filled with sympathy. “Where…"

Through your haze, you recognized the waiting ambulance and you tried to lift your head up, panic setting in as strong hands pushed you gently back down.

“It’s okay, we’re going to get you to a hospital. Just lie back. We’ll be there soon.”

The lift of the stretcher only made you more anxious as your consciousness came back. The wrecked car sat in the middle of the highway; another car smashed off to the left that you got a glimpse of briefly before the doors closed in front of you.

“My husband… please.” Your words came out in a jumble, your trembling hand trying to reach for your phone.

“We’ll try to contact him. Just try to relax.”

Your brain tried to piece together how you had gotten here, eyes shut as you attempted to concentrate. There was nothing there, only dark space and the light that had shone in your eyes when you came to. The analgesic finally took hold, making you slip into darkness while the sound of the siren lulled you to sleep.

⏳

Machines beeped and chirped in the hospital room, your eyes barely opening to survey the sight in front of you. Bandages adorned your arms, your neck stiff as you turned to the form in the chair next to you. Blue eyes caught yours, a soft smile playing on his lips as he got up to kiss your forehead gently. At the feel of him, you didn’t want to let go as your hand reached up for his, fingers threading together. You were grateful he was there, eyes filling with tears as he rubbed his nose against yours.

“Hi, sweetheart. You slept through the night. How are you feeling?” he asked, that deep, rich voice you loved so much that gave you a sense of calm.

“What happened?” You were afraid to ask, unsure if you wanted to know the details that he was going to most likely readily provide. Knowing your husband the way you did, he already had gotten his answers.

“Some idiot ran a red light. T-boned you good. They walked away without a scratch.” You could tell by the tightness of his jaw that he was trying to maintain some sense of composure, keeping his anger at bay. “You sustained a concussion, sprained arm, a lot of cuts and bruises but you’re going to be okay. The concussion is a little worse than they originally thought so you’ll need some more tests.”

You wished you could remember how it happened but you couldn’t remember, your head still murky from the pain medication.

“I thought…” Steve paused, his eyes glassy with unshed tears. “I don’t know. I didn’t want to think about what I was thinking. All these business trips and these missions and we take the time for granted. I missed the call and by the time I realized I did, an hour had passed. Fury had us check on something for him, time got away from me. I’m so sorry, honey. I should have been here earlier.”

“It’s not your fault, Steve,” you tried to soothe, your hand enveloped into his own as his head gently pressed against yours. For the moment, you were soothed by his presence and nothing else mattered.

“We need to slow down. The doctor said you’ll be out for at least three weeks.”

At Steve’s mention, your thoughts immediately went to your new job and you panicked at the thought of the number of days you would be missing.

“Three weeks?”

You saw the hopefulness fade slightly in Steve’s expression when you had asked your question, his hands still holding yours as he brought it up to his lips, kissing the top of your hand softly.

“Three weeks. Your job already knows. They sent flowers and they’re expecting you to heal, not to work. It’s going to be okay. I’m sure you can manage three weeks without work.”

There was a sense that you had hurt his feelings, the way he looked away for a moment as if lost in thought before he let your hand go at the sight of the nurse who came in to check on you.

“Good morning, how are we?” the nurse asked cheerfully, checking the monitors and looking through your file. Steve slumped down in his seat, hands in his lap while he observed the nurse who hovered over you.

“She’ll need rest, right?” Steve piped up.

“Oh yes,” the nurse agreed. “Doctor said three or four weeks of rest.”

You caught Steve’s small smile of what you knew was a victory. He liked to be right and you stayed silent, allowing the nurse to check your vitals before she left.

At the close of the door, Steve let out a sigh, his thumb brushing against your cheek gently.

“I’m taking some time off, too. Rest means no work, okay? No conference calls, no trying to sneak into the office. Promise me,” Steve instructed, the loving stare he gave making your eyes tear up.

“I promise,” you answered, unsure of just how long your promise would last.

You were grateful for a week, maybe more, of just resting and getting your mind back to where it needed to be. You’d been so distracted with being overbooked, trying to clear out your emails, and attending meetings that your brain was almost fried, let alone the fact that you hadn’t stepped foot inside your own home in almost two and a half weeks.

Maybe you needed some time off.

⏳

Steve had made good on his own promise, his schedule cleared and his time dedicated to making sure you were getting rest. Your mornings were met with a full breakfast and plenty of time to spend with Steve. He’d ignored your protests as he hid your work phone and laptop and even you had to agree that for the first time in a long time, you felt free. At least three times that week you’d fallen asleep in his arms on the couch, an old movie still playing in the background that Steve knew by heart. Your headaches had stopped and you were able to go on morning walks - something you hadn’t done since your first year of marriage, even if Steve had run literal circles around you as your arm was still in a sling.

By the second week, you were beginning to get antsy, stopping short of asking for your work items back. He always looked so disappointed when he told you no, reminding you about the doctor’s orders until you finally gave in. You kept yourself busy with reorganizing things in the house, finding his mother’s old recipe cards in a small black box. You’d busied yourself looking through the cards, pulling out one that you knew Steve would remember, and got to work while he was out with Sam and Bucky.

By the time you’d finished, you were proud of what you had accomplished, the buttermilk pie cooling on the rack alongside the Shepard's pie and soda bread that you’d followed to the letter, even down to his mother’s tip of keeping the Shepard's pie in the oven a little longer than it was supposed to. You had to admit to yourself that it was nice to slow down and have the time to do something worthwhile that you knew he would enjoy. It wasn’t going to be something you could do all the time but you were sure you could schedule at least twice a month.

Your bruises had been healing nicely, the additional rest you had been getting paying off with how much better you were feeling. The number of things you’d been able to accomplish around the house had also been a welcome surprise, even under Steve’s watchful eye that you did not overexert yourself.

But it was moments with Steve that you cherished the most, waking up next to him without having to turn and see an empty bed or opening a hotel room to find a queen size bed with no super-soldier asleep, dead to the world, as you fought for the blanket that was underneath him.. In these moments, having coffee together and not talking about work, going out for walks and getting fresh air and listening to him share about his life, the one that he had before he met you and how much he’s changed with the world that left him behind.

Which was why you were proud of your dinner offering, a reminder that his past was just as important as his present and once you heard the key in the door, you couldn’t help but get a little excited that he was home. It was silly, you supposed, knowing he’d been gone for a few hours rather than days at a time. You figured that you were making up for lost time. Another reminder on your calendar to get home before him so that you could have these little moments that made your heart flutter when you saw that smile that had made you fall in love with him the first time you’d met.

When he made it into the kitchen, he stopped and inhaled, blue eyes dropping to the top of the stove.

“What is that?” he asked, looking over your shoulder as you tried to push him away. You were no match for him, his broad chest like a wall as he saw the product of your hard work.

“Shepard’s pie, soda bread, and buttermilk pie,” you answered proudly, watching his eyes widen at the list.

“Shepard’s pie? I haven’t had that since…”

“It’s your mom’s recipe. I found the box when I was cleaning.”

There was a sense that maybe you had overwhelmed him and for once in his life, Steve was speechless, hovering over the stove to inspect the food.

“Are you hungry?” you asked, his face still in awe as he pulled out a chair to sit.

You plated his food quickly, placing it in front of him before you took your spot across the table from him, watching him reach for his fork. Nervous to make sure you had gotten it right, you held your breath as he took the first bite, watching his eyes close as he chewed.

“Honey, this is…” his voice trailed off for a moment, savoring his bite. “It’s like I’m a kid all over again. I can’t believe it. This is incredible.”

“You like it?” You were pleased but his reaction, the smile on his face as he continued to eat without stopping made you realize that you’d missed cooking. Another thing to schedule on your calendar when you had the time.

“I love it,” Steve praised, a short nod letting you know you’d done well.

When you finally took a bite, you wondered how much Steve must have looked forward to it. The note from his mother had pointed out the recipe was only brought out on special occasions, let alone the buttermilk pie that was reserved for the holidays. Steve had told you before that they never had much, especially with his father passing away and his mother working in the wards.

You cut him a slice of pie, placing it down before you cleared the rest of the plates in front of him. While you loaded the dishwasher, you noticed his gaze and you straightened up, blinking at him slowly.

“What?” you asked, unsure of why he was giving you the long look.

“This is really nice. I don’t think we’ve sat down together to have dinner in maybe months. It’s been all take-out and sitting on the couch. Look at you,” Steve paused with a smile of appreciation. “It’s nice seeing the domestic side. I can’t thank you enough for tonight. This was a nice surprise. Best two weeks we’ve had in a while.”

Closing the dishwasher, you gave him a small smile back, wiping your hands on a dishtowel before you turned your attention back to him.

“It has been nice,” you agreed. “One more week until I go back to work.”

“You don’t have to.”

“How’s the pie?” you inquired, trying to take his mind away from the direction you knew the conversation was heading in.

“Perfect. Maybe next week we can make dinner together.”

“That would be nice.”

Your words hung in the air as you tried to think of how you would ask him for your things back. You had been resting, taking it easy when fatigue when hit but overall, you’d felt better than you had in weeks and were ready to get caught up on everything you’d missed.

“Maybe Monday you can finally let me get back into the swing of things,” you hinted, leaning down to give him a kiss on the forehead.

“Maybe. Or you could just rest. Like the doctor told you to. I meant it when I said this has been the best few weeks we’ve had. Maybe even since we got married.”

“Steve.” You hadn’t meant to be shocked but you sucked in a breath, hurt by his words.

“Honey, that’s not what I meant. I just… look at us. Eating dinner at the table. Going grocery shopping together, having time for each other. We don’t get that anymore and you’re already trying to cut the time that you need to be getting better in half to catch up on work.”

“Just a few emails and that’s it. I’m going to be so far behind if I don’t start now.”

Steve got up from the table, the fork clinking against the plate with the force of him rising. He disappeared for a moment, leaving you alone in the kitchen while you finished loading the dishwasher. You knew you had hurt his feelings and you felt horrible, trying to think of a way to apologize while trying to explain your reasons.

When he came back into the kitchen, he handed you your laptop and work phone as you accepted them.

“There. Happy now?” he asked, not waiting for you to answer before he turned on his heels.

“Steve,” you protested, feeling the start of tears that began to burn. “I don’t want to fight.”

“We aren’t,” he responded, his voice cold. “You wanted your things back and you have them. I’m going to see Scott. That will give you time to catch up on work, won’t it?”

He didn’t give you a chance to respond before you saw him disappear, the door closing as you were left in silence before you heard the sound of his motorcycle starting, leaving you inside the kitchen clutching your laptop and phone close to your chest.


	3. Chapter 3

Steve walked up to the small apartment, his head down as he took the stairs as he had done decades ago. Before he was the man he was now, he was Steven Grant Rogers, the ten-year-old kid from Brooklyn who had rushed home from school after getting into a fight. He’d lost, of course, but that hadn’t stopped him from getting up and brushing himself off.

The particles that Scott had placed into the cuff that he currently had in his pocket was enough for him to get there and come back. One round trip. That was all he asked for. To the outside world, he would be gone only seconds. In this realm, this expanse of time, he could take as long as he needed. He watched his ten-year-old self from the window, trying to wipe the dried blood from his nose as he glanced from outside. The clothes he wore made him fit in comfortably enough that people left him alone, clean-cut enough with a hairstyle that hadn’t changed much from when he was a kid. From here, he had the perfect view of his mother, Sarah. The yearning that filled up inside him to break the rule and engage with her, to embrace her and tell her about the life he’s lived battled with his integrity to stay put and observe without interruption.

The Shepard’s pie was cooling on the top of the stove, much it had been on their much more updated appliance. His younger self dragged himself in the kitchen as his mother made a fuss over him, wetting a cloth to dab the dried blood around his face, her blond hair still tied up in a ponytail from her shift at the hospital ward. Even when he knew he lost the fight, he could come home and his mother would act as if he had won. Every single time, without fail. His mother was one of a kind. Caring, protective, honest, and kind hearted. Always thoughtful of Steve, making sure he was well looked after, even with all his ailments.

Steve couldn’t look away as his younger self coughed. Steve, knowing the wheeze and the painful burn from his asthma at that time. In this cramped apartment, little Steve was happy, digging into his Shepard’s pie that his mother had made. Showing that same exact smile that Steve had when you had made it for him. It was like home.

His mother was devoted to him. Both past and present Steve knew that. As he watched her dote on his younger self, kissing the top of his head while she busied herself in the kitchen, he remembered it all and how it felt. A safe place without worry and a mother’s love that was stronger than anything that could try to kick him down. It was because of her that he was the man he was now.

But she had been just like you, Steve realized, watching her disappear for a moment and then back with a fresh uniform on. Always working, always needing to help those in need. His mother never stopped. Days would tick by and he would remember reading himself his own bedtime stories, no one to share his nightmares with or to have peace of mind when he woke up in the middle of the night. Steve looked down at his watch, patting his pocket as he realized he’d left his phone in the locker at the Pym lab. He’d wanted to take a picture, just to show you how beautiful and hardworking she was as he described her to be.

He’d lost his mother due to her work. That pain he felt, the one he carried with him watching mothers with their sons, to grandmothers who held their grandchildren, he knew she would never experience it. Never know that if his firstborn child was a girl that he would name her Sarah. The tears that slid down his cheeks were for her but also for you, as he had almost lost you as well.

Steve wasn’t going to let that happen. He watched her hold his younger self tight, her eyes misted over as she placed a long and hard kiss on the top of his head. Steve rested his hand on the window, lip trembling slightly.

“I love you, Ma,” he whispered, watching her grab her coat from the rack, her fingers massaging the small of her back from her tiredness.

His fingers curled into a fist against the window as she walked out the door, watching his past himself turn around with slumped shoulders as he finished his dinner.

Steve would make sure you didn’t end up like his mother. You’d be safe and protected, free to raise your kids without worrying about a job that demanded so much of you that you couldn’t be there for them. Your job was demanding enough, let alone with the accident that could have taken you away from him. Steve would not be able to process that additional grief.

It was bittersweet, Steve walking behind her as he tried to commit what she looked like to memory now. She was younger then, a spring in her step as she continued down the street, unaware of the man - her son - that was following behind. His curiosity and yearning had won out, something he’d tried to talk himself out of since he’d gone down the stairs. On his luck, she had been walking so fast that the cap that had sat upon her head floated off and landed on the ground.

Steve picked it up as she gasped in surprise, her hands going to her head before she turned around.

“I got it,” Steve assured, her kind smile directed at him as she nodded. “Still looks good.”

“Thank you,” she replied, taking it from his outstretched hand. “I appreciate it. Sometimes I swear I’d lose my head if it wasn’t attached.”

For a moment, Steve was speechless as their hands touched and he longed to take it, to keep it longer in his own so that he could tell her who he was, to let her know what was in store.

Instead, he gave a brisk nod, ignoring the lump in his throat that had been growing since he had first laid eyes on her. His mother spied his wedding ring and looked up at him.

“Well, thank you so much, stranger. Your wife is lucky to be married to a man with such kindness.”

Steve straightened his shoulders before he smiled.

“I’m the lucky one, ma’am. Have a good day.”

He watched her hold her cap in her hand as she crossed the street and disappeared down a sidewalk before he took out the cuff to program the coordinates back to the lab. He’d got what he came for and with it, newfound energy to make sure you knew that your importance to him and to your future children.

⏳

“I guess you’re on a mission. I’m hoping not and that you’re with Sam or Bucky. The rain is really coming down. I wonder if you can hear it while I’m talking, it’s pretty loud. I know I missed our scheduled FaceTime call. I was in meetings and the time just got away from me. I know it doesn’t seem like I’m trying but I am. I’ll keep trying until I get it right. Please don’t be mad. I love you, Steve. So much, I hope you know that. Well, um, I guess just call me when you get this,” you’d said, your voice heavy with sadness before Steve heard the small click on the other end.

He’d played it at least three times since he’d sat in the locker room of the lab, Scott hovering at the door in wait for him as he changed his clothes. His chest felt tight at the timestamp from your voicemail. It was left merely fifteen minutes before your car accident, Steve still fighting an assailant from Fury’s mission as he had missed the call. He wondered now if he could have talked you out of going to meet your colleague. He’d seen your bruises as you’d slept, watching you wince as he tried to tend to your sore body. You’d gone through so much trauma and all you could think about presently was your job. Steve told himself that he would make you understand that this job could not provide the peace of mind that you needed. You would constantly be running, to try and be better than before when you were already perfect. He would make you understand that all you needed was to let him take care of you.

“You alright, Cap?” Scott asked, breaking Steve’s concentration.

Steve felt the wetness on his cheeks and hadn’t realized he’d been crying, let alone having an audience. With a heavy sigh, Steve nodded, pushing his phone into his pocket.

“Yeah,” he responded after a moment, wiping his eyes. “Got to see her. Guess I wasn’t as prepared as I thought I was going to be.”

Steve couldn’t lose you. He wouldn’t let you sacrifice yourself. Not when there were so many years ahead of you and the promise of having children. Now, more than ever, he would see to it that you were a mother. You wouldn’t have to leave your future children alone. You’d put them and him first.

“Hank perfected the particles but he never touches on the emotional aspect. Quantum realities and time jumping isn’t for the weak. You’ll be okay though. I’m glad we were able to do it.”

Steve stood, grabbing his bag and his keys before he closed the locker.

“I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done. It meant a lot to me. Gave me some clarity and closure. Thanks, Scott. You’re a good man.”

Unable to handle praise well, Scott nodded, a slight blush in his cheeks at the compliment from a hero he looked up to himself - a man of integrity, a protector of the world.

As Steve headed down to his motorcycle, he looked at the time. It was late enough that he knew you were probably asleep and he wanted nothing more than to head upstairs, sink into bed, and hold you close before you woke. He’d seen the sadness in your eyes when he’d given up on trying to keep you from working, handing you back your things before he had left you standing in the middle of the kitchen.

Steve was certain he broke several speed limits on his way back home.

⏳

You heard the keys hitting the counter before you were halfway down the stairs, unable to sleep since he’d left. The emails that had mounted up, the good wishes and incoming messages for you to address for when you got better had overwhelmed you and you’d worked through half of them before you started to get tired, your eyes glazing over before you finally closed your laptop and climbed into bed.

You had one more week left until you were back to work. Working from home didn’t have the same excitement as being around others did. The hustle and bustle of moving from meeting to meeting, hours flying past as you accomplished everything on your list, and more. The exhaustion from knowing that you’d worked hard, pushing yourself to be better each day. That’s what you missed - competing with yourself. You told yourself you had one more week until you were back into your routine and you needed to make these last few days count with Steve.

What you hadn’t expected was to see him sniffling, taking off his leather jacket and hanging it on to the closet. In so many ways, Steve was never afraid to show his emotions, but crying was something that he rarely let you see.

“Steve? Is everything okay?” you called out, his form still moving in the dark.

When he came toward you, his eyes and nose were red, skin flushed as his expression was one you’d only seen a few times. There was a determination that flooded in his gaze once he reached you. Even though you were a good height, Steve still had several inches over you, his body nearly caging yours. You played with the hem of his worn shirt out of habit, afraid to look him in the eye.

“How was Scott?” you tried to ask, Steve still continuing forward as he pushed his body toward yours, making you stumble backward.

“I want you to rethink your promotion.” It wasn’t an off-hand thought. It was a command, one that you’d seen him give in that tone to his recruits. To the team that he led.

“I don’t want to talk about this,” you protested, Steve inching you backward until the backs of your thighs hit the couch. “We just end up fighting.”

“So quit,” Steve ordered you, his voice almost in a threat. “I could have lost you in that accident. Do you know what they would have done if you’d died? Mourn for a day and then post the job. They don’t care about you.”

“Steve!” you admonished, his hands reaching for your face as he lifted your head up slowly. “Stop. We aren’t talking about this.”

“I lost her!” Steve shouted, tears welling in his eyes. “My mother worked double shifts in those hospital wards. Breaking her back for people who relied on her. Do you know what happened to her? She died! Everyone I care about never wants to slow down. I said I would take care of you and I meant it then and I mean it now.”

You were trembling as he brushed away your tears with his thumbs, shaking his head slowly to deter you from trying to counter his argument. His grip on your face was gentle but strong.

“No. Whatever you’re going to say, just don’t. Do you know how much you mean to me? I love you, honey. Nothing is going to get in the way of what we have and what we’re going to have. Not anyone else and not that job. Do you understand?”

You wanted to be defiant, to tell him he was wrong. Whatever he was going through, you would do your best to help him but you weren’t going to quit your job. Not when you had forged a path for yourself. You weren’t living the shadow of who he was, the Captain that everyone looked up to. You thought of yourself as his equal on a different playing field. What he was asking - demanding - was something you couldn’t bring yourself to do.

“Answer me, sweetheart,” Steve urged, his voice back to normal. “Tell me you understand.”

You nodded, still terrified at the fact he had shouted at you. He’d never raised his voice at you before and it was like you had been slapped.

“No,” Steve persisted. “I want the words.”

You let out a squeak, trying to find your voice.

“I understand,” you whispered, not wanting to upset him further. Something had set him off and whatever it was, you wanted him to snap out of it.

“Good,” he sighed loudly, his arms wrapping around you as he held you to his chest, his chin dropping onto your head as you heard his heart hammering against his chest. You weren’t sure what was going on, afraid and too nervous to push back. “I’m sorry I shouted. You’re my world, honey. I’m sorry I scared you. I had a rough time earlier.”

His lips pressed against your forehead, lingering for a moment before you reached on your tiptoes to kiss him, hoping to soothe whatever was going on inside his mind. He inhaled sharply as you broke the kiss, his hands gripping your ass as he ground you against him, his erection cradled between you.

“You don’t know what you do to me,” Steve said desperately against your ear. “How bad I want you when you’re away.”

He turned you around, your knees hitting the top of the couch as his arm wrapped around your middle, mindful of your sprained arm. You yelped in surprise, your knees teetering on the space as he held you close.

“It’s okay,” Steve breathed as you struggled to balance, your back hitting his chest. “I got you.”

His free hand skated down to the bottom of your shirt - his shirt - fingers sliding between your legs as he kissed your cheek. He hummed against your ear as he found you, wet and hot as his thumb slid against your bare clit.

“You were waiting for me, weren’t you?”

You mewled at the pressure of his thumb on your bundle of nerves, the languid strokes that made you slicker with every movement. Licking your lips, you whined in frustration at the loss of his hand, hearing the soft sound of the zipper of his jeans and the bump of his hand on your backside before you felt him, hot and hard against you.

“S-Steve,” you whimpered, his mouth silencing yours as he kissed you. His cock slid back and forth between your slick folds, your hand gripping the couch as your nails sunk into the back of one of the throw pillows.

“Tell me you want it,” Steve purred against your cheek, your eyes squeezed shut. “Say it.”

The teasing felt like torture, feeling the head of him and the veins of his thick cock under you and not inside you made you keen for more, your hand slipping between your legs to take him inside you before his hand wrapped your wrist and placed it back on the couch.

“Not yet,” he warned. “Use your words. Tell me what you want.”

“You,” you choked out, hips lowering to try to feel more of him.

“Yeah? Fuck you hard and fill you up? Give you a baby like we’ve been talking about?”

Your breath came in spurts, mind blank with nothing but lust as you nodded, the friction of the head of his cock bumping against your entrance ever so often that you thought you’d die from the torture of not having him inside you. It had been over a month since you’d had sex, both of you past the frustrations, and maybe, a part of you wondered, if this would help bridge the gap of the painful distance you both had experienced that had now materialized in Steve’s actions.

“Yes,” you blurted out. “Yes, please, God.”

Steve answered your impassioned plea as he slid up inside you slowly, the fat head of his cock inching past your swollen walls as you wailed, going deeper and deeper until he reached the hilt of you with a low grunt of satisfaction.

“So good, honey. Can’t wait to have you nice and full with our baby,” Steve breathed against you, his thrusts hard and fast as he held you against him. Strong enough to keep you in place, your knees aching from the back of the couch. It was a dull ache, the pleasure you were experiencing outweighing the discomfort. In the back of your mind, you knew you couldn’t tell him the truth about your birth control, your fears allayed by that fact. It was still too early in your career to sacrifice the time to be a mother but you loved the way he spoke the words against you, fantasizing how you would look as he bred you.

Steve’s hips snapped against you, urging a squeal from your lungs as his pace was frenzied like a man out of time, his breath huffing between his clenched teeth.

The pressure that had been pooling into your core was reaching the boiling point, your thighs quaking in anticipation.

“Steve, please, please,” you begged, rocking your hips back into him before you finally shattered as he bumped against your cervix at the perfect angle, your walls fluttering around him as you tried to regain your balance. Steve held you tighter, not letting up as your eyes rolled back before he stilled, a hard breath that nearly parted your hair as he came inside you.

His shirt stuck to your slick skin, your lungs expanding to take in air as he withdrew slowly, his fingers sliding to the entrance of your cunt, his fingers pushing back the small pool of cum that had leaked out.

“Gotta keep it in, honey,” Steve reminded you, his fingers stretching back inside you. “Every last drop counts. This is your future.”

You weren’t sure you had heard him correctly, his hands helping you off the couch as your knees nearly buckled. Steve was there to catch you, to hold you close as the smell of sex and sweat hung in the air. He kissed once more, holding your chin for a moment as he looked into your eyes. The determination was still there, his face flushed with desire. Your body was still trying to recover, the boneless feeling still echoing through your limbs.

“Let’s get you cleaned up and ready for bed. You’ve got one more week to rest. Maybe we can spend half of that time on starting a family.”

⏳

True to his word, Steve had managed to keep you occupied for the last week. There were lunches with Sam and Bucky, doctor appointments, and random errands during the day. By night, you were happy to cook dinner while Steve washed the dishes, sinking into bed to let him satisfy his need to try and get you pregnant. You told yourself that it would pass, knowing how many of your friends had children and how Steve had commented on one day having a family just like them. You were sure it would happen, maybe in two or more years, you weren’t sure but it would happen one day, once you were able to accomplish what you wanted.

The morning you woke up to go back to work, Steve was already awake, clad in his running attire while you finished buttoning up your shirt. He looked wistful at the sight of you, eyes dropping down to your waist before he smiled. Perhaps he hadn’t gotten the idea out of his system yet. You were certain once he went back to work that he would forget all about starting a family immediately and let nature take its course.

“These three weeks have blown by,” Steve mused with a sigh, straightening up after he tied his shoe. “You’re still going to discuss your promotion with your boss, aren’t you?”

You fell silent at his question, rolling your lip under your teeth as you decided to lie. 

“Once she’s back from her business trip, yes,” you answered, watching his approving nod as he leaned over to kiss you.

“Good. Have a good day and don’t work too hard. I’ll see you when you get home and don’t stay too late.”

Truthfully, by the time you got into the car, you already knew you would be staying later than normal. Two last-minute meetings had popped up that required your attendance and you knew that you could explain it once you got home, but not now.

Your assistant, Penny, was all too eager to talk to you on the drive in, relentless with sharing information and news that occurred in your absence. Few decisions had been left up to you, waiting for your guidance and you fired off your directions as you pulled up into the parking lot, Penny scurrying over to take your things as she followed you.

“Mrs. Rogers, it’s so good to have you back. I swear, it was like a madhouse while you were gone. We were told not to disturb you, per your husband’s orders, but it was -”

You halted your steps, whirling around to look at her, her eyes wide with shock at your confused expression.

“What did you just say?”

Penny nibbled at her cheek as she tried to give you a smile. You realized she was going to backtrack. 

“It’s nothing, Mr. Rogers just asked that we didn’t bother you while you were healing. It made sense, we were fine.”

“You just said it was like a madhouse,” you reminded her.

“Yeah,” Penny agreed, trying to think of what to say next as she continued forward, leaving you behind. “But we managed so it’s fine. And anything else that needs attention is on your desk. No big deal. I’m sure he just wanted to make sure you were resting.”

You didn’t answer her on the way to your office, opening the door to see your desk covered with folders and sticky notes. Penny had finished her debriefing and gone back to her office while you tried to prioritize the pile in front of you. Steve’s direction had frazzled you, making you wonder why he thought it was appropriate to step in on your behalf. Between that and the way he had acted the week prior, you felt good to have work as your distraction.

When you lowered yourself down into your chair, you decided you might as well get it over with, calling Steve who picked up on the first ring.

“Hey,” he greeted, his voice cheerful. “Miss me already?”

“Of course,” you answered, looking around the office as you closed your eyes and waited for the fallout. “I might be a little late tonight. There’s just so much to sort through but once I get it done, I’ll be better set up for the rest of the week.”

There was silence on the other end for a moment before he responded.

“That’s okay, honey. I’ll make us dinner and it will be waiting for you when you get home.”

You sighed with relief, his voice still upbeat. Maybe you both going back to work had calmed him down after all.


	4. Chapter 4

Steve got your voicemail for the fourth time before he made it to the receptionist, giving her a kind smile as she looked up in awe. It seemed like your workload not only had doubled but it tripled. You left before dawn and came home well after sundown. You’d kept your promise, still carving time to make dinner, even if it was well after Steve had gone to sleep.

He decided he was going to surprise you, take you away from the office for a little to take a breather, make you remember to slow down.

“Captain America,” the receptionist breathed, her cheeks burning red at the sight of him, the awe in her voice making him shake his head. “I mean, Mr. Rogers. How can I help you?”

“Hi, I’m just looking for my wife. I’m here to take her to lunch.”

The receptionist nodded quickly, pointing down the hall. He followed the line of sight of the direction she was pointing in, checking the time on his phone one more time. He hadn’t eaten all day and he hoped you’d be out soon.

“Sure. I think she’s in a meeting right now but you’re welcome to wait for her. She should be done in about ten minutes or so.”

“Thank you, Miss,” he replied, heading down to your office.

Once inside, he took a look around, unsurprised at how you’d decorated it, potted plants and pictures abound. It was a nice office, a clear view of the waterfront with wide windows that drenched the space in sunlight. A picture of the two of you was near your monitor, taken in Italy when you had gotten her first promotion. Steve picked up the photo, remembering how happy you’d been to finally visit a place you had only dreamed about once. You looked happy, kissing him while you both held glasses of wine in the countryside. Things had been simpler then.

As he gazed at your calendar, he frowned. Every date was filled, at least for the next two months. Business trips, meetings, charity events, and everything in between. At this point, he’d be lucky to try to schedule a weekend away with you without trying to negotiate. He’d purposely been making sure you were well fucked, in the morning and night in an effort to get you pregnant. It had to have been the stress, he wondered, knowing that he’d been relentless with filling you up with his cum as much as possible.

Steve hadn’t forgotten that you were supposed to talk to your director. He’d known the woman from their PR events, an idea fleshed out by Tony and Rhodes to make them appear friendlier in the public eye. He could talk with her if you didn’t do it, make her realize the importance of you being safe and not taking on too much responsibility.

It could wait, Steve reasoned, blowing out a frustrated sigh as he searched your drawers. You had a sweet tooth, just like he did and he wondered if you had any candy or gum lying around to appease his hunger until you got out of your meeting. The first two drawers he pulled held nothing but more office supplies. In the third drawer, he found a treasure, a bag of gummy bears that you’d stashed away. He picked them up, shaking a few into his palm as he noticed something underneath it.

Picking up the package, Steve’s eyes narrowed as he read the label.

Birth control pills.

He gripped them in his hand, trying to contain the anger that had risen to the surface, clenching his jaw to keep from shouting. You’d agreed that it was time to talk about having children. You promised you were going to make more room for him in your already busy life. For a little while, you had, Steve stealing moments away that prior to your accident he had to nag you for. But this was on a whole other level of deception.

The opened pack was halfway done. All attempts he’d done to get you pregnant had been in vain, your birth control prescription at the highest dose due to the serum that was in his veins. Without it, you would have been pregnant months ago. You’d lied to him, Steve trying to reason that you were stressed out but the word why continued to pound into his head until it was a mantra.

He dropped the pack back down into the drawer when he heard your footsteps, popping the last of the gummy bears into his mouth as he chewed quickly, closing the drawer as he saw you open the door. Your head was down as you read another text message, frustrated at the lack of communication when you saw him. You let out a squeak of surprise as he raised his eyebrows, his mouth set in a frown.

“Steve,” you started, blinking as if he was an illusion. “Hi. What… what are you doing here?”

He took out his phone, waving it from side to side.

“Tried to call you a few times to let you know I was coming. All I got was your voicemail,” Steve answered. “Figured I’d surprise you and take my girl to lunch.”

You looked at your phone once more, flustered at the fact he was standing in front of you and that you had another meeting in the next thirty minutes. It wouldn’t be enough time to go anywhere but downstairs to the commissary or at the deli across the street.

“Now?” you asked, aware that he was giving you a strange look. “I would but -”

“But what? Too busy for your husband? You were supposed to be slowing down, remember?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and you looked back at your phone. You felt his eyes on you, waiting for you to answer. You watched Steve wander over to your calendar and you wished he hadn’t seen it. You saw his back flex, his shoulders rolled as he turned back around to face you, blue eyes clear as the day under a dark expression.

“Since you’ll be busy for the next two months, the least you could do is let me take you to lunch. Since it seems I won’t be seeing you much after that,” he hinted, his jaw clenched tight.

“Steve,” you began, trying to scramble for an excuse. It was always too late to explain. “It’s just a preliminary schedule. Things could change.”

“Yeah,” Steve swallowed hard. “They sure can.”

You shook your head, holding up a finger for him to wait as you fired off a decline to the upcoming meeting with a valid excuse. It wasn’t every day that Captain America showed up to take you to lunch. Steve didn’t seem like himself and you were worried, dropping your phone on the desk before you went to him, hugging him tightly.

“I’m sorry, Steve,” you apologized, tears pricking at your eyes at your broken promises. “I’m free, honey. Let’s just go to lunch. Anywhere you want. I’ll go.”

He seemed to relax in your arms at your words, Steve kissing the top of your head before he straightened you up.

“No tears,” he replied, giving you a small smile. “Let's just go to lunch and we'll talk.”

⏳

Steve leaned back in his seat, fixated on a family across the way that had caught his attention. The father held his baby in his arms as the wife looked on lovingly. A picture-perfect scene, his eyes gazing far away as you tried to get his attention.

“Steve?” you teased, waving your hand in front of him. “You there?”

“Yeah, sorry, I just,” he trailed off, his attention turning back to you. “Everywhere I go, I’m seeing babies. Makes me think soon enough we’ll have one of our own. To see you pregnant, that beautiful body full of my baby. Seeing you holding our child for the first time. I think about it all the time.”

You smiled at him, nodding in agreement but stopping short of affirming his prediction.

“We’ve been trying for weeks. I’m thinking maybe I need to go see a doctor. Just to make sure everything is in working order,” he mused, eyes boring into your own. “Maybe you should too. Just to make sure we’re both healthy.”

“You’re the healthiest person I know, Steve,” you pointed out. “It just takes time.”

“Seems like we’ve been in short supply of that lately.”

“Back to that again,” you sighed, placing your fork on your plate.

“Yeah, we’re back to that again. I’m trying to make sure you and I are on the same page here, honey. That we want the same things. I’ve backed off for weeks now, trying to give you space to get everything in order, to slow down like I asked.”

You inched your chin up at his viewpoint, letting out a huff of frustration.

“You didn’t ask, Steve. You demanded.”

“Because we’ve talked about this. Over and over. You promise and then it never happens. I don’t think you do it on purpose,” Steve qualified quickly, watching the irritation flicker in your gaze. “It’s work. I know how that is. You get caught up and before you know it, half your life has passed you by. This is our future. We only get one shot at it. I’m sorry if I refuse to give up on us and this subject. Taking a break from your job isn’t going to be the end of the world for something as precious as motherhood. You would be a wonderful mother. Or you could just tell me that isn’t what you want anymore.”

He tossed the linen napkin on the table as he stayed silent, giving you a chance at a rebuttal. You did want children. Biological and adopted. Both of you had talked about it at length several times. But motherhood at this point in time would put your career on the backburner and you were committed to making sure you were the best in your field. Just like Steve was.

“I know I’ve promised,” you started to say, his head already beginning to shake. He knew you’d come up with an excuse and this time, you had nothing. “I just need more time.”

“Time,” Steve repeated blankly. “I think we’ve been given a lot of that in the past and we’ve been pretty wasteful with it, haven’t we?”

“I just got this promotion,” you protested.

“And you’ll get promoted again and again. What good is it if you can’t spend time with the people you love? I’d give it all up for you in a heartbeat. I just want you to take this seriously. You’re my priority. I just want to be yours too.”

You inhaled a shaky breath at his words, covering your mouth with your hand as you sniffled. His expression softened immediately, his arm reaching for you as you waved him away.

“Honey,” Steve tried to interrupt, your shoes pushing away the chair from the table.

“I’m late for a meeting,” you whispered, getting up from your chair and kissing him on the cheek. “I’ll be home on time tonight. I know my promises don’t mean anything but I will.”

You heard him call your name but you kept walking. Only when you were out of earshot did you find a space to cry before you were able to compose yourself and head to your next meeting. You couldn't let them see you like that, broken and shaken.

⏳

“Back so soon, Mr. Rogers?” the receptionist asked him as he paused at the desk. “You just missed her. She was heading home for the day.”

Steve held up a small white bag with a sheepish smile.

“Had a bit of a sweet tooth and devoured all her candy. Plus, I’m fairly certain I left my keys on her desk. I’ll be quick,” he promised with a wink. “Just trying to replace her candy before she notices.”

“Of course,” the receptionist responded with a flirty laugh, looking back at him as he walked down the length of the hallway.

He was done in a flash, crumpling up the paper bag into your trash bin on his way out. He spun his keys that he had taken out of his pocket to hold up to show the receptionist on his way out.

“Have a good night,” he called out to her. He was proud of you for keeping your word and he made a mental note to drive home a little faster to see if you were waiting for him at home.

⏳

You heard him come in as you met him at the door. You’d managed to leave on time and you were proud of yourself for dodging the last minute emails and invitations for conference calls. You were surprised you had beat him home, giving yourself enough time to make a quick dinner with time to spare.

Though lunch had been a trying time, you were still hopeful that Steve would understand your point of view. The conversation had been even more heated than normal and you truly didn’t want to fight. Life hadn’t been this complicated until you’d started to believe that you could achieve more and Steve, while supportive, hadn’t known just how much you were dedicated to your job. You hadn’t either until you were reaching for more responsibilities and seeing yourself grow.

But by the time he was inside, you met him in the kitchen as he saw his dinner waiting for him.

“It’s nothing special,” you said behind him, watching him turn around to face you. “Corned beef and cabbage. I cheated with the corned beef.”

Steve blew out a breath as he relaxed.

“I left early to make sure I could make it with enough time. I fixed my schedule for next week. Off by five at the latest. So we could spend time together. I put in some vacation time.” Your voice faltered at the sight of his stoic expression. “I really don’t want us to fight. I hate it. I thought about Peggy and how you -”

At the mention of Peggy Carter, he pulled you closer to him, his hands on your shoulders.

“You aren’t like Peggy. Get that out of your head. She outright refused to stop working and that was great for her but I knew my place and it wasn’t with her. It’s with you. You aren’t going to be like her. I’m going to make sure of it.”

A flutter of fear rose in your belly at his words as he kissed you, the feeling dissolving slowly. Maybe it was just your nerves. Once you broke the kiss, he settled into his chair as you placed a plate in front of him. You spied a bag on the counter and you raised an eyebrow.

“What’s that?” you asked, reaching for the bag.

“Vitamins. Figured you and I could use them. Just as a precaution, you know? A good multivitamin never hurt.”

You shrugged, pulling out the two bottles of pills and examining them.

“I guess,” you remarked, placing them back down on the counter before you opened the cabinet to take out a wine glass.

“You sure you want to drink tonight?”

His question made you pause, still holding the glass in your hand while you thought about it. You weren’t a huge wine drinker but it seemed like something to do to take the edge off of how he was acting.

“Why not? We could make a sizeable dent in our collection,” you countered.

“Maybe. But I could draw you a nice hot bath with one of those bath bombs you’re always buying instead. Ease your muscles since you had a long day. Maybe I’ll join you.”

You put the glass back into the cabinet as he finished eating, guiding you upstairs before he ventured off to the bathroom as you heard the faucet turn on. Your declaration of taking your calendar seriously had seemed to avoid any unpleasant conversations. If anything, he was amicable to your efforts.

“Which one?” Steve asked, holding up a handful of the sweet-smelling bath bombs. “I’d prefer you didn’t pick the glitter one. This one seems good. Lavender, I think?”

You plucked the lavender-scented bomb out of his hands and brought it to your nose. It would help you sleep and your back was still slightly aching from the accident, something you’d managed to keep quiet in fear that he’d make you take another two weeks off of work.

“Lavender it is,” you decided, handing it back to him.

You got undressed, hanging up what didn’t need to be dry cleaned and laundered as the calming scent filled the air as the faucet continued. When you stepped into the bathroom, Steve was already inside the tub, specially made to fit you both when you were remodeling the house. His head was leaned back, his eyes closed for a moment in bliss.

“I take it back when I said baths are overrated,” he mumbled, opening one eye to see you standing there as he reached out for you. As you stepped into the tub, you let out a breathy noise of pleasure as the water, tinged a light purple, enveloped you as you sat between his legs, settling against his chest amid the candles that flickered on the ledge.

At his expert fingers that massaged your back warmed by the temperature of the bath, you sighed in relief as your eyes closed.

“Better than wine, right?” Steve asked, kissing your shoulder as he pressed his fingers down your spine in a soothing rhythm.

“Mhm,” you breathed. “Much better.”

As his hands went lower, you let out a squeal of discomfort, realizing he was pressing on the sore spot you’d sustained in the crash.

“What?” Steve asked, his voice filled with alarm. “What’s the matter?”

“Nothing, just a little shock,” you tried to excuse.

“Shock or pain?”

You were quiet, the water dripping back into the tub as he snaked an arm around your middle, pulling you gently against him.

“From the accident?” he asked, his voice deceptively soft.

“I don’t know. Maybe,” you hesitated his lips against the shell of your ear.

“Sounds like it. I had a feeling you went back too early.”

Before you could reply, his knuckles brushed down your side as he hummed in disapproval.

“It’s okay. You know your limits. You’d tell me if anything was bothering you, right?”

“Of course,” you agreed, his hand gliding down to your hip, fingers splayed against your thigh.

“Good. I’m so happy you’re slowing down and taking a good look at your calendar,” he praised you, his fingers trailing down to your inner thigh, getting closer to your core. “It’s a hard change but a good one. I love you.”

You felt his fingers, spreading you open as you leaned your head back, his lips against your cheek that trailed down to your jaw.

“You’ve been so wound up with work,” he acknowledged,the pad of his index finger working against your clit slowly as you sucked in a breath. “Shh, honey. Just relax. Open up for me.”

His lips drew in the skin on your neck, nipping it slightly as you sighed, legs spreading wider as he pushed a thick finger inside you, your walls clenching down on the digit.

“Hungry little cunt,” Steve teased you, pushing another finger inside. “You want more?”

You swallowed hard as you nodded, his thumb brushing against your bundle of nerves as his fingers stilled inside you. You felt him, hard as a rock behind you and yet, he didn’t ove.

“S-Steve,” you stammered, his fingers pulling out as his knuckles pressed against your walls as you keened.

“I realized the other night we just need to be in tune with each other,” he murmured, his fingers sinking back inside you as the water sloshed around the tub. “Knowing what each other wants, right?”

His arm that was around your middle rose to take one of your hardened nipples between his fingers, pinching them just enough to elicit a moan from you.

“One day, these are gonna be nice and swollen with milk, aren’t they, sweetheart?” Steve asked, pinching the other breast as his fingers mercilessly thrust inside you. “God, the day I find out you’re pregnant, I’m not going to let you go.”

You heard his words, barely over your own breathing as his fingers changed positions, playing your body in a way that only he knew how.

His fingers hooked inside you, dragging along as the water continued to smack against the tub.

“I can feel it. You’re so close, honey. Don’t deny me. You know I always get what I want.”

His voice was so soft that you found yourself nodding along, reaching the edge that seemed to ripple with every touch.

“Tomorrow I’ll fill you nice and proper,” he continued against the rise of your breathy moans, your hand holding his in plans as you surrendered to the pressure, your back arching slightly as he soothed you with a soft kiss while you slumped against him.

“Good girl,” Steve praised. “I’d say it’s time for bed, don’t you think?”

He helped you stand, wrapping a fluffy towel around you as he dried you off, your eyes staring at the body wash that you didn’t get to use. Your head was still in a blissful fog as he guided you to the bedroom.

Once your head hit the pillow, you felt the slight dip of the mattress near your feet, hands gripping your ankles as they were spread, lips as light as butterfly wings inching from your calves up to your knees. As he continued upward, you tried to close your legs, still sore from how he’d gotten you to come apart on his fingers.

“Honey, please,” you begged, shaking your head from side to side, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip as his tongue teased your already tender core. “I can’t.”

“Don’t deny your husband, honey. One more. Just for me.” His tongue lapped at your folds as your hands carded through his hair. It felt good. So good that you didn’t want him to stop but you felt the small pangs of dull pain as he continued.

“Gonna tire you out so you sleep well,” Steve promised, his mouth languidly moving against you.

He did as he promised, gathering you into his arms after you came apart once more; the last thing you remembered was the heavy blanket that covered you as you laid across his chest and fell asleep.

⏳

When you woke up, you knew you were late. You were always up before the sun and as you hastily jumped up from the bed, Steve was in the shower and you glanced at the clock with a groan.

You’d overslept by almost thirty minutes, running into the guest bathroom to shower and brush your teeth, pulling on a dress, and slipping into a pair of pumps while you ripped your blazer out from the closet and scrambled down the stairs. Early meetings meant there was zero tolerance for being late. Not for what was at stake.

You dug out the coffee pods, eyeing the new box with a face.

“Steve! You bought decaf coffee!” you called up the stairs. “Gross!”

Rolling your eyes, you popped the pod in and shoved a tumbler under the coffee maker while you grabbed a piece of fruit.

Once your coffee was done, you had little time left but you remembered your vitamin, popping it into your mouth and downing it with a long sip of coffee before you headed to the car.

You made a mental note to make an order to replace the decaf as you pulled out of the garage.


	5. Chapter 5

Steve looked over the land, the salty breeze whipping through his hair as he looked up at the house that had been newly constructed. It was expansive, yet still had room for any additions that would most likely come along the way. The concrete had been recently poured and cured, the landscaping completed hours before he arrived. He had paid less for the land than he had expected, especially on such prime real estate that overlooked the water. The perfect place to start a new chapter in your lives.

“All state of the art, like you requested,” Stark confirmed behind him, his arms crossed over his chest. “Threw in a little extra. Got a little carried away..”

“Couldn’t have done this without you,” Steve assured him, giving him a tap on the back in appreciation. “I owe you big time.”

“You sure do,” Stark smirked, looking up at the house in satisfaction. “Furniture should be here in a few days. Tell me when you’re ready.”

The house key spun around Steve’s finger before he gave it one last look.

He’d done his research, this house as a contingency plan in the event he needed you both to have some time away from the city. You’d kept up on your promise, making the effort to not live at work like you had prior. There were slip-ups but not like before. He’d made sure your boss understood.

Steve cherished the dinners you had together, even looking the other way when you snuck your laptop into the living room to finish your work. When he’d seen enough of you peering at the bright screen, he’d toss you over his shoulder, ignoring your protests to finish before taking you up to bed.

Steve smirked to himself at the thought of you under him, on top and in every single way he’d had you in the past month. He’d gotten his way, aware of the way your body reacted to him when he’d spill inside you, your breathy mewls like a melody in his ears. You were dutiful to what he knew you believed to be a quirk of his, keeping his spend inside you, not wasting a drop per his rule. You believed you were cushioning his ego, the way you’d give him the small knowing smile before you fell asleep, too exhausted to keep your eyes open.

And you were always exhausted these days.

⏳

“Mrs. Rogers, I can cancel your two o'clock,” Penny offered, watching you cradle your stomach slightly as you sipped your second cup of ginger tea.

“No,” you denied, feeling the wave of nausea pass. “I can make it. I think it’s just indigestion. Maybe food poisoning. It’ll pass. I can’t miss it. I’ve already rescheduled once.”

Penny lowered herself into a chair across from you. Not wanting to look at her concerned face, you searched in vain for a piece of gum, trying to keep your sense of composure as the small fan blew cool air across your forehead that was damp with perspiration.

“What about your four o'clock? I can push that to another day,” Penny countered, looking through your calendar on her phone. “That would be an easy move. You could leave right after your meeting.”

“Trying to get rid of me?” you tried to tease, clicking through your calendar. It was a beautiful day and you felt miserable. Whatever it was, you hoped it would pass.

“No,” Penny laughed, placing her notebook on the desk. “I just… humor me, okay? What if you’re pregnant?”

“No,” you denied with a wave of a hand in dismissal. “I can’t be.”

“You sure? You used to love the ravioli from Giovanni’s and now you can’t even smell it without getting sick. You take the other elevator now because you said the other one smells funny.”

“Sensitive nose,” you tried to reason, opening your drawer to look for your birth control pills. You’d been taking them every single day without fail. Steve had been relentless in his pursuit to get you pregnant. He’d kept you up until the early hours of the morning and so you weren’t surprised at how tired you were.

But you knew your body. The nagging feeling that this was more than just the stomach flu made you nervous.

“I think I’ll take you up on the offer,” you conceded, finishing the last of your tea. “I’m going to stop at the pharmacy and get something for this upset stomach, go lay down and try to sleep it off.”

Penny seemed relieved, worried as she always was about you. Just like Steve. You were anything but fragile but now, with her suggestion hovering over you, you needed to know and put your mind at ease.

“Perfect!”

You covered your mouth as you felt the familiar sensation rising again, running to the door to make it into your bathroom, the door closing right after you heard Penny yell behind you.

“Cancelling your two o'clock, too!”

⏳

You wrung your hands as you paced back and forth, your lower lip bruised with the pressure of your teeth that had abused your tender flesh, pulling and sucking it in, tasting the salty fluid that had dripped from your cheeks and onto your lip.

Time had seemed to stand still with every single test you took. Too much to think about, too many angles of where this could go. Outside the bathroom, your phone chimed loudly with incoming meetings and appointments, making up for the lost time that you had taken.

You opened the door, Steve standing right in front of you, the heat of him and his stare burning into your eyes. You let out a startled squeak, his body filling the frame of the doorway. Steve had always been strong but you were acutely aware of how that strength could intimidate.

“Steve,” you started, not moving as you tried to smile, knowing he’d seen the tears that had gathered in your eyes. “I thought you were at work.”

“I was. Thought I’d come home early and surprise you.” He motioned toward the counter with a nod of his head. “Do you have something you want to tell me?”

The tests were lined up in a row, the results all the same. Usually, you’d hear him coming, heavy footsteps, or him calling your name before he reached you. This was stealthy, the way he seemed to have been waiting for you.

He took a step, bumping into you as he looked down at you. You were in the way of him finding out what you suspected he already knew to be true.

Your eyes were wide as he turned you around gently, guiding your steps as he walked you toward the bathroom counter. You could see his expression in the mirror, eyes dark as his gaze swept to the five pregnancy tests that were lined up.

His hand cupped your belly, your eyes fixated on him, watching him swallow hard.

“Why don’t you tell me what they say?” he asked, his voice filled with emotion that wavered slightly as he picked up one of them and held it up to you.

“P-positive,” you answered, feeling his grip on you tighten as he placed it back down and reached for another.

“This one?”

“Positive,” you responded, your eyes going to the discarded boxes that were in the trash.

“What about this one?”

“Steve,” you protested, your stomach churning with anxiety. “It’s -”

“Keep going,” Steve commanded, nuzzling his face against your temple. You looked at what he was wearing. White shirt, sweatpants, and socks. How had he managed to get changed so quickly made you suspicious of his timing.

“Positive.”

With a small shuddered breath and an approving nod, Steve kissed your cheek as he picked up the fourth test.

“And this one?”

You pressed the palms against the counter to try to get some distance but Steve stood firm, his fingers splayed over your stomach as he rubbed it in a small circle.

“Steve, I -”

“Keep going, sweetheart. What does it say?”

You let out a puff of air, eyes on the positive result as you caught his smile.

“Positive.”

“One more,” Steve soothed, reaching for the last test as he brought it up to you.

“What does this one say?”

Your heart thumped in your chest, the words clear and bold. When you hesitated, your eyes looked up at his via the mirror, almost in a plea to get him to stop.

“Go on. It’s the last one. What does it say?” Steve asked you, keeping the test in front of you.

“Positive.”

Steve shook his head with a mischievous smile.

“No, that’s not what it says. Read it.”

Your lower lip throbbed slightly as you chewed on it, teeth pressing down so hard that you swore you’d cut through.

“Pregnant.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, his smile a mile wide as he placed the test back down on the counter.

He circled you back to him, his hands on either side of your face as you saw his expression, overjoyed amid the glassy beginnings of tears that were threatening to fall.

“So what do you want to tell me?”

This was not how you imagined it would go. It was too soon. You wanted at least another year to get everything together and you’d been trying so hard to make sure that you kept to your schedule. The birth control hadn’t failed you before and you’d heard of false positives but five in a row let you know that it was not a coincidence.

You were going to bring a new life into the world. Steve’s prediction had come true.

“I’m pregnant,” you recited, a tear slipping down Steve’s cheek as he kissed you. It was soft, gentle enough for you to respond but there was desperation there, the way he held you close to him as if he thought you’d run away.

You told yourself it was the shock of the news and definitely not because you were pregnant. You already knew you’d love your child and they were but a small blip on the radar. Women with children still worked, you told yourself as Steve caressed your face gently as you smiled back. This could work. You just needed to focus and work hard.

“You’re going to be such a wonderful mother to our baby,” Steve praised, wiping a tear from your cheek. “I’m going to take good care of you both. Are you happy?”

You were happy, even with the surprise of it. Steve’s intensity made you nervous and you tried to reason that it was new for both of you and you needed to relax.

“Of course,” you answered quickly, feeling his grip loosen. “I am, I just… it happened so fast. Just trying to process everything but yes, I’m happy, honey. We’re gonna have a baby.”

Steve completely relaxed then, cuddling you closer as he sniffled. He’d be a great father. You knew this without question.

“Good,” he sighed with relief. “Why don’t you rest while I clean up here?”

His voice left no room for you to argue and he made a path for you to exit, feeling his gaze on your back while you climbed into bed. You stifled back a yawn, body exhausted and mentally tired as you ignored the pinging of your phone and went right to sleep.

⏳

You woke up to the feel of your laptop being pulled from your hands and placed on the coffee table. It was dark, Steve still in half of his uniform while you blinked, trying to adjust to the lack of light.

“How long have I been asleep?”

“Long enough for me to rush home and check on you. I called you twice, no answer. Your phone was on silent,” Steve admonished, turning the volume back on as he sighed. “You said you’d stop working so much from home.”

“Last minute proposals,” you argued sleepily. “There’s a big meeting in a week or so. I wanted to make sure it got done.”

“You’re exhausting yourself. You have Penny. Why don’t you have her help you?”

“She has enough on her plate.”

“So do you,” Steve snapped, helping you get to your feet. “You’re stressing yourself out. That’s not good for you or the baby.”

“We’re fine. I’m almost done,” you argued, reaching for your laptop as he stood in front of you, blocking your way.

“Steve, I need to finish.” You weren’t afraid to remind him that you still had a job to do, regardless of what he wanted. You’d sacrificed hours and days to slow down and you wanted to make sure that you finished what you started.

“No, you need to rest.”

Your temper flared as you got to your feet. Your irritation at the decaf coffee that had been replaced with only tea had been mild at the time, knowing that Steve was trying to do what’s best for you. But you were not about to let him control your work. You’d done well in the past few months since you found out you were pregnant, keeping up on your doctor appointments and balancing your time. This was a last-minute project that needed to be completed and you were not about to let him talk you out of it.

“I’ll rest when I’m done with it. You’re making this out to be a bigger deal than it needs to be. Once I’m done, I’ll rest. I fell asleep for hours, I’m already behind.”

“On whose timeline? Your boss?”

“No,” you sighed, trying to push past him as he held you in his arms. You didn’t want to be coddled. “Steve, let go.”

“Whose timeline?” he asked, eyes searching yours.

“My own!” you shouted. “I just want to finish this. I’m tired, I set a deadline for this, and I want to see it through.”

His hands dropped to his sides at your tone, his head shaking in disbelief. You’d never yelled at him before and you looked away, watching him back up as you tried to reach for him.

“I’m sorry,” you started to say, his back turning on you, his footsteps beginning to fade. “Steve… don’t do this.”

“You wanted to finish. So finish. I’m going to bed.”

The bedroom door closed, leaving you alone downstairs. You lowered yourself to the couch, opening up your laptop as you tried to focus on work. Your eyes lifted to the ceiling, guilt taking hold. You’d make it up to him once you finished this proposal.

When you finally crawled into bed, he was fast asleep and you snuggled closer to him, trying to get steal some of his warmth. Your fingers grazed atop his hand before he gripped them tight, eyes half open as you gave him a small smile.

“I just wanted to say goodnight,” you whispered, trying to push him back down gently as his arm caged over you.

“Did you finish?” he asked, his voice thick with sleep.

When you nodded, he kissed you gently, his hand sliding down to your growing belly.

“I’m sorry I yelled,” you apologized, his mouth gliding down your neck as you lifted up your chin to give him better access.

“I’m sorry I’ve been on edge. I’m trying to be better, honey. I promise.”

“I know,” you agreed, clinging to his shirt as he pulled you on top of him. His warmth made you sleepy, your legs straddling him as you laid your head on his chest, his fingers skating down your spine.

“Everything’s gonna work out fine. You’ll see,” he promised.

⏳

The gel on your stomach made you shiver, Steve holding your hand as the ultrasound technician glided the wand over your belly.

“Looks like… ah, there we go,” the tech said with a chuckle. “Showing right off. Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Rogers. It’s a boy.”

Steve leaned in to look at the monitor as the tech pointed out the anatomy, from head to toe.

“A boy,” Steve swallowed with a slow nod. “My son.”

You didn’t care if it was a boy or a girl, you just wanted happy and healthy but your mind wandered to the nursery that you’d held Steve off on starting. Seeing his smile, you knew that you would not be able to hold him off any longer.

The gel was wiped off your belly as you pulled down your shirt, Steve hovering over you as he kissed your forehead.

“I’ll go print out the pictures. I’ll be right back,” the tech promised, leaving you both in the room.

“You know, back in my day, it was just a surprise. I guess I would have waited but I got a little antsy. With our next one, we can be surprised.”

“Can I give birth first before we start talking about another one?” you teased, your phone chiming somewhere inside your purse.

You knew better than to ask him to hand your purse. You’d no doubt get a lecture that this was considered family time and Steve was very protective of it.

Your doctor stuck her head into your room, coming inside as she handed you the print outs.

“Congratulations, you two. The baby looks healthy and so far, everything looks great.”

Your phone rang and you tried to lift yourself up. Whatever it was, it had to be an emergency. By the ringtone, you knew it was Penny.

“We’ll see you back here in a few weeks,” the doctor continued as your phone fell silent. “Do you have any questions so far?”

When the phone rang again, you glanced at Steve, who rolled his eyes and handed you your phone. Two missed calls and a voicemail popped up on your notifications and then a text from Penny that caught your attention.

“If I wanted to travel,” you began, watching Steve shake his head. “Is it safe?”

The doctor hesitated, looking at Steve who was glaring at you.

“It’s safe to fly in the second trimester but there are opposing opinions. Some argue that a five hour plus flight is too long and that you would be better off with one or two hours. Ultimately, I’d avoid traveling just in case of any potential complications. But it isn’t just flying. If you were to travel by car, I’d suggest several stops to stretch your legs, walk a little bit.”

“That won’t be a problem,” Steve answered. “You planning to travel without me?”

“No,” you replied, feeling your face heat up with embarrassment. “I just was asking, that’s all. In case we wanted to go somewhere. Like a babymoon.”

The doctor nodded in understanding.

“Many couples do that, Mr. Rogers. It’s not a new thing but it has gained popularity in recent years,” the doctor assured him.

Steve raised an eyebrow in curiosity as you fired back a text to Penny, promising to call her once you were alone and could speak.

“Well, I better let you two go. I just wanted to pop in and say hi and tell you congratulations on your baby boy.”

As the doctor left, Steve sighed slowly, staring at the print outs.

“Back to work after this?” he remarked, his tone almost bitter.

“There’s a small crisis at work but I can deal with it at home,” you offered, his face brightening at that prospect. “Make a few phone calls, soothe Maria so she doesn’t freak out and we can order dinner? Thai?”

You saw it again, the flicker of anger in his eyes before he relaxed with an easy smile.

“Thai sounds great.”

⏳

“A babymoon.”

“What?” you panted, Steve’s hands cradling your belly as you rocked your hips forward. The increased blood flow made you extra sensitive and he felt so good inside you that you didn’t want to stop.

“Babymoon. We could do it after.”

“Steve,” you whimpered, sinking back down on him. “It’s… supposed to be before the baby is born.”

“We can do whatever we want once he gets here.”

You threw your head back amid a moan, trying not to look down at your belly that brushed against him.

“Just… Steve, please,” you begged, trying to chase the spark that was increasing by the second.

He responded by holding your thighs, pressing up so deep inside you that you came with a raw shout, stifling a laugh at how loud you had been. Steve followed behind, keeping you still as he poured inside you.

“I think the neighbors heard you,” he growled in a laugh, easing you off of him as you heard your phone go off.

You reached it before he did, trying to catch your breath.

“Penny,” you answered. “It’s late. Everything okay?”

“Normally, you know I wouldn’t call. Mr. Rogers has a strict rule to not disturb you but Maria broke her leg. Somewhere up in Aspen, I don’t know all the details but this puts that business trip in jeopardy. The board members are asking for you to step in.”

You sat up, cradling the phone. You would address Steve’s overstep after the call but you were worried about Maria.

“Is Maria okay? She’s been looking forward to that for months,” you replied.

“I know. But the break is bad enough that she’s going into emergency surgery. They want you. They feel like you can do the job just as well as her. You’re her second in command.”

“Penny,” you whispered, getting up as you pulled on a pair of shorts to head down the stairs, ignoring Steve’s curious stare. “Are you positive?”

“One hundred percent. One of the board members caught me on my way out.”

You looked up the stairs to see if Steve was there but there was nothing.

“I can’t travel far, remember?”

“I know and I looked up the flight and it’s only an hour and a half. You go, stay for two days and then fly back. I can book it all tonight.”

The opportunity to help Maria – and to showcase your talent – was worth thinking about. You knew you didn’t have much time and you could always ask Steve for forgiveness later.

“Book it,” you confirmed.

“Great, I’ll -“

The phone was pulled from your hand as Steve held it up against his ear. You hadn’t heard him coming, his eyes focused on you as he spoke.

“Penny, she’s going to have to call you back,” Steve finished, hanging up as he held the phone in his hand.

“Steve, what are you doing?” you demanded, trying to reach for your phone.

“You tell me first. Book what, honey? Where are you going?”

“It’s a business trip. Maria broke her leg, they asked -“

“Where?”

“DC,” you answered, his eyes narrowing.

“So they want you to take her place. You’re pregnant, are they out of their mind?”

“You’re being ridiculous. It’s an hour and a half flight. I’m safe still,” you scoffed, still trying to reach for your phone while he held it out of reach. You saw the anger on his face, the way his eyebrows knitted together.

“Do you know what happened you left? I got a call you were in the hospital. I almost lost you. I told you it was too much. They must be out of their mind. Quit.”

Your mouth dropped open at his instruction.

“I am not quitting my job because they want me to fly to DC. That’s ludicrous.”

“Tell me you aren’t going.”

You sighed, holding out your hand for your phone.

“I’ll call her back and we’ll discuss options.”

“No,” Steve shot back. “You’re calling her back and telling her you aren’t going. That you’re quitting.”

You threw your hands in the air in frustration, turning away from him to compose yourself before you looked back at him.

“I’ve done everything you asked, Steve. You wanted me to slow down? I did. You wanted me to get pregnant? We’re having a son. I’m not putting my career at stake because you want me to stay home.”

“This job…” Steve trailed off, shoving your phone into your hand. “You’d leave me before you left the job. Your priority isn’t me or the baby. It’s work.”

You couldn’t stop yourself, the sound of your hand hitting his cheek so loud that you saw his face reddening before you felt the pain in your palm. You covered your mouth as you sobbed, Steve’s eyes filling with tears.

“I deserved that,” he agreed with a nod. “But what I don’t deserve is you prolonging our future so you can get ahead.”

He didn’t come near you as you cried, cradling your stomach as you sunk down to the couch.

“I tried to let you do this on your own but you’ll never stop. What are you going to do when our son is born? Let some stranger babysit?”

“Mothers do it all the time, Steve. God, I’m not quitting my job for your overreaction.”

“Sounds like you made your choice,” Steve said quietly, heading toward the door as he grabbed his jacket.

“Where are you going?” you asked, getting to your feet to follow him. “We have to talk about this. We can’t keep storming away from each other and apologizing.”

“I’m fixing this. Once and for all,” Steve snapped, flinging the door open. “Stay put. Don’t call her until I get back unless you’re willing to make that choice for us.”

“Steve,” you cried out, watching him head to his motorcycle. “Where are you going?”

“To see a friend.”


	6. Chapter 6

Penny was preparing your itinerary, apologizing after every sentence as you sniffled through your instructions. Instead of two days, it would be completed in a few hours. One round trip and you’d be back home. You compromised, as you usually did with your business dealings. Everyone would be happy.

Except Steve. You cleaned yourself up, taking a hot shower to ease the stress away, pulling on a pair of maternity leggings and a baggy sweater. You had bemoaned the loss of your usual outfits but you paused in the mirror, smoothing down your shirt to look at your growing belly.

“Your daddy is so stubborn,” you whispered to your belly with a wistful sigh. “Mommy can do both, you know. Run a business and be the best mom you’ve ever had. He’s just… stuck in the past. He’ll come around, right?”

You put away your laptop, hearing the sound of his motorcycle coming. Tensing up, you headed back up the stairs to the safety of the bedroom, not wanting to see him when he first came in. He was angry when he left and you were sure that his mood now was probably not much better.

Once the door was pushed open, Steve stood quietly, the tension of the past argument still hanging in the air. You’d never argued this much before. This house had always been filled with love, maybe some small discussions but never as much as it had been since you’d gotten this promotion. Your job had never compared to Steve’s. He was saving the world, protecting it and you were in awe of how he could balance it. You knew you could do the same, you just needed him to understand that life was different for you. You were a woman and that balancing act did not come easily.

“Did you have a good visit?” you asked, looking over your shoulder at him.

There was a small black box in his hands that he held tightly as he sighed, chest slightly deflating as he looked around the bedroom.

“Yeah,” Steve replied, taking a step closer. “I did. Got some fresh air, cleared my head.”

His voice sounded calm and you perked up at that fact. He looked at the pictures that adorned both of your nightstands - the pictures of you from various stages in your lives together. Your favorite one was your wedding day. You both were so happy, so excited for your future.

“That’s good,” you agreed.

“I have something for you. Come here.”

He helped you up off of the bed, hand gliding down your belly with a small smile.

“He’s growing,” Steve remarked. “God, I love you pregnant. Knowing that I’d come back home to see you… nice and swollen with our baby. Can’t be beat, honey.”

He uncovered the box, revealing a small cuff that glittered in the light. He lifted it up, motioning for you to hold up your wrist.

“It’s pretty,” you marveled, Steve slipping it on as he admired it.

“Only the best for my girl.”

Steve kissed you, slow and soft as if trying to apologize for the way he had acted. Your phone rang and you tried to ignore it, kissing him back as your hands ran down his broad chest, a tear sliding down your cheek. It could be like this all the time, you told yourself. He just needed to compromise.

When your phone rang again, you broke the kiss, looking back as Steve’s eyes darkened.

“Penny?”

“Yes, but,” you stammered, Steve looking over at the nightstand as your phone vibrated.

“Answer it,” he instructed.

“I don’t have to. She can leave a message,” you countered, Steve’s jaw ticking slightly at the sound.

“No, go ahead. Answer it.” It was given as an order and you broke away from him, picking up the phone as you swiped to answer it, bringing it up to your ear.

“P-Penny,” you started, feeling Steve’s eyes on you. “Now isn’t a good time.”

“Oh, I think it’s a great time,” Steve interrupted as you shook your head.

“I’m sorry, just real quick,” Penny rushed out. “Everything is all set, except they have a red eye flight and it’s an upgraded one. More legroom. Wanted to see if you were interested.”

“Uh, no,” you replied, Steve crossing his arms over his chest. “That wouldn’t work.”

“No problem, I can totally tell them to keep the same plan. The car will pick you up at 9. Sound good?”

“Sure, Penny. That sounds great.” You watched Steve’s tongue roll under his lips. “Talk to you soon.”

As you hung up, Steve was ready to interrogate. You saw his shoulders straighten, eyes blinking twice before he inhaled.

“What did Penny want?” Steve asked, watching you place the phone back on the nightstand.

“Nothing.”

“Didn’t seem like nothing for two back to back calls. Are you sure? Sounded like maybe you had some plans to confirm.”

You lifted your head with a deep breath. Penny had always been loud and you had sworn that you had lowered the volume at the sound of her voice. That super soldier hearing was no match for your phone.

“Steve, it’s just for a day,” you tried to explain, watching his mouth tighten as you came toward him. “It isn’t two days anymore. I’ll fly in and fly out within a few hours and then, I’ll take some time off. We can get the nursery ready.”

He nodded like he heard you but there was no understanding in his expression. You knew that immediately and that same flutter of fear caught you.

“You’re not going,” Steve informed you, his hands sliding into his pockets.

“Steve, please don’t. It’s for a few hours. It’s like I’ll be at work.”

“No.”

He scoffed, looking around the bedroom again.

“No isn’t an answer. I’m going and if you’re still mad then I guess we have to talk about it when I get back.”

“We’re done talking,” Steve assured you, holding onto your hands.

“Steve, let me go,” you protested, trying to break free of his hold. HIs eyes bore into yours, a small smile playing on his lips.

“I’ve tried to tell you from the beginning. Slow down or I’d make you slow down. You keep forcing my hand, honey. I’m doing this for us. For our baby.”

His thumb slid over your cuff as it hummed, your eyes going to the light that began to glow. Steve slipped his thumb over the cuff he pulled from his pocket.

“Steve, seriously, let me go!” You were afraid, the look in his eye so calm and collected that you were afraid of what he wasn’t saying, rather than what he had told you.

“No,” Steve said, holding you close to his chest as the cuffs began to beep. “I’m not ever letting you go.”

Within seconds, you felt like you were falling, slipping away into darkness amid hazes of purple, pink and blue.

⏳

With a blink, you were in Steve’s arms, frigid salty air surrounding you and biting your skin through your sweater. His arms were still around you as you heard seagulls above, squawking loudly while you lifted your head. The scent of salt and pine filled your nose as you looked around fearfully.

“Steve? Where are we? What did you do?” Everything around you looked unfamiliar, the wind breezing through the trees. Wherever you were, it wasn’t home.

He kissed your forehead, smiling down at you as he pulled the cuff off of your wrist and put it back into his pocket. He whistled as he guided you along.

“Steve, please,” you begged, his hand on the side of your belly as he walked behind you, guiding you to a walkway up to a massive house. “Just tell me where we are.”

He didn’t answer you, still walking with you as he helped you up the steps. You spied a sleek black car that was parked outside. You’d never seen it before and Steve looked over with a low laugh.

“1948 Bristol 401. I’ve always wanted one and now I have it,” he mused, taking the key from his pocket as he pushed it through the lock.

“Where are we? Steve, please answer me.” You were worried, looking back at the land in front of you. There didn’t seem to be any other houses around.

Steve opened the door to the house, guiding you inside as he held your hand, closing the door behind him as you wiped the tears that were sliding down your face.

“Home,” he answered, looking around the furnished space with a satisfied smile. “We’re home.”

The house was fully furnished, the smell of a new house burning your nose and making you nervous. You gripped Steve’s hand harder as you looked around the new place.

“We aren’t home,” you argued. “That car out front… the furniture...”

“Top of the line. Only the best for my girl and our growing family.”

Your lip trembled as he walked you down the hallway, holding onto you like you were fragile. Perhaps you were, your eyes glazing over at the new - but antique to you - furniture and decorations.

“Where are we? This isn’t anywhere near the city. What about my job? Your job… Steve, what…” you trailed off, looking at the wedding pictures down the hallway as your voice trembled. “You can’t do this.”

“It’s already done, sweetheart. We’re staying here. You’re gonna have our baby and we’ll be one happy family. No more Avengers, no more corporate job. Just peace and quiet with our little family.” Steve smiled at you, pushing open a door to the nursery that had already been completed.

“What? No, Steve, this isn’t… we have to go back. Wherever we are, we have to go back. We can talk about this but we have to go back.”

His hands cradled the sides of your growing belly, shaking your head as a tear ran down your cheek. Steve leaned his head down, pressing his forehead against yours.

“No one more distractions. No more goddamn cell phones. Back to the way things were. Simpler times. Husbands coming home to their wives while they waited for them at home? Those were the days.”

He walked you down to the massive bedroom, almost the same set up as your other bedroom but with different furnishings. An alternate timeline. Steve had paid attention to every little detail.

“I don’t want simpler times. I want my life back,” you sobbed. “Take me back. Where are we?”

Steve looked around the bedroom with a satisfied smile.

“1948. We’re on a small island in the San Juan Islands in Washington. The dawn of a new age.”

“What? How…” you trailed off, your anxiety increasing as more tears slid down your face. “I don’t want to be here. Take us back.”

“No. We’re done talking about this, honey. When it’s time for the baby to be born, you’ll have the best doctors, I promise. Why don’t you go lay down?” Steve asked, his calm demeanor making you want to scream.

He ignored your cries as he pulled back the blankets.

“Just overly tired, that’s all. A nap will set you straight. When you wake up, we’ll talk about it.”

“I’m not tired,” you protested, trying to push him off of you. "Steve, stop."

“Honey,” he warned, his voice low. “Wives listen to their husbands, remember? This isn’t like how things used to be. You need me now. You want a car, a bank account? That goes through me now. No more meetings to worry about, the less responsibility you have, the better off you’ll be to have time to spend with me and the baby.”

Steve placed you in the bed, pulling you against him as you sobbed, his grip on you so tight that you couldn’t move.

“Go to sleep, honey. I promise, I’ll explain it all but you need to rest.”

“I don’t want to,” you cried, tears dripping down onto his shirt. “I don’t want this. I want to go home.”

“We are home. No more,” Steve admonished, kissing your temple before he whispered against your ear. “It only took once to get you pregnant. That’s your only job now, honey. I’m gonna keep you nice and round with our babies. Like you’re meant to be. No more birth control.”

⏳

When you woke up, you had hoped it was a bad dream. The wind whistled against the windows, your red, swollen eyes aching as you adjusted to the low light. You wanted to call Penny - call anyone - and you let out a cry at the fact your cell phone was gone. You ripped the covers away, your feet padding down the hallway as you heard laughter and talking. Maybe whoever he was talking to could help you.

A man with dark hair and a mustache looked up from his drink at you, Steve sitting at his desk as he followed his gaze. The man stood as Steve reached you, fresh years gathering in your eyes.

“Honey, this is Howard Stark,” Steve said quietly, your eyes trying to focus on the man in front of you.

Howard Stark.

Tony’s father.

“They really do make them better in the future, don’t they?” Howard mused, extending his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Rogers. I’ve heard so much about you. You’re going to like it here, I promise. Steve thought of everything.”

Steve’s hand went protectively to your belly, kissing your cheek as you stifled back a sob, his shield hanging up behind his desk.

“See honey? I told you everything would work out.”


End file.
